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Oral Sex - Fellatio and Cunnilingus and Analingus

What is Oral Sex?

Oral sex relates to anything done with the mouth from:

  • deep kissing and continuous mouth and tongue contact over the body and primarily on the genitals
  • fellatio -penis and mouth contact for sexual gratification
  • cunnilingus -vagina/clitoris and mouth contact for sexual gratification
  • analingus -anus/rectal opening and mouth contact for sexual gratification

Oral sex should always be done with a great deal of patience, personal hygiene, sensitivity, tenderness and most importantly a consensual attitude of fun and enjoyment! As not everyone is comfortable with oral sex, use communication (talk about it first!) to be sure where and what your partner's comfort zones may or may not be!

Like we always say, safe, sane and consensual... and that means consensual for both! Talking about oral sex helps in the discovery of phobias or fears from earlier experiences or negative painful memories, which may be slowly overcome with time by patiently and lovingly working on them. Rushing the process makes it very uninviting, so take your time, relax and go with the flow... literally!

What is Cunnilingus and How is it Done?

Oral sex for women is called cunnilingus and most women find it very exciting. Cunnilingus is the fine art of making love to a vagina with your mouth and tongue. But remember, no two women are alike, so each one will have their own likes and/or dislikes when it comes to oral stimulation of their vagina and clitoris. It is a delicate act, requiring patience, practice and dedication... and again, most importantly, communication.

A strong slippery tongue can be used with precision on the clitoris without danger of causing any pain, unlike a finger. Whenever you touch a woman's vagina make sure your finger is wet. You can lick it or moisten it with juices from inside her. Be sure, by all means, to wet it before you touch her clitoris because it does not secrete any juices of its own and is extremely sensitive and it can hurt if the area is too dry. Also, a note to guys with nasty facial stubles: Prickly facial stubs on a woman's soft inner thighs during cunnilingus can "kill" the mood. Shave your face and trim your nails before attempting cunnilingus.

cunnalingus oral sex pic (Image Credit: Another Sex Tutorial)

Everyone must find how they like things done to them, and this is a very personal thing, but here's a few basic steps to get started:

  • foreplay and kissing, especially face and mouth
  • gradually working your way down her body, kissing and stroking her breasts and belly
  • kissing and stroking her inner thighs, which is a very sensitive and exciting area for most women.
  • move in toward the clitoris by gently spreading open (with tongue and/or fingers) the labia lips, while licking with the tip of your tongue
  • flick your tongue lightly and firmly all around the clit and up and down the inner labia
  • move gradually inwards with your tongue, nuzzling, burrowing and thrusting your tongue into her vagina
Some women may like additional stimulation:
  • a finger or a vibrating or non-vibrating toy or dong into the vagina and/or into the anus
  • breasts and nipples fondled and lightly pinched and taunted
  • stimulate the G-Spot zone at the roof of her vagina while having oral sex (the G-Force is great for this!)
When your partner has achieved orgasm:
  • do not leave her alone
  • talk to her
  • stroke her body
  • caress her breasts
  • keep making love to her quietly until her orgasm has eased
  • she needs sensitivity from her lover
Oral sex can be one of the most exciting sexual experiences you can have:
  • take your time
  • practice often
  • pay attention to the needs and signals of your lover
  • enjoy yourself
FAQ's for Cunnilingus:

1.)What About the Smell and Taste?

As we've been saying: communicate. If the taste or smell bothers you gently explain that to her... a refreshing wash before staring may be the trick. Be sure to use a mild soap and rinse all of the soap residue away, to prevent a mouthful of a soapy taste! Another idea is to rub some lavender oil or other scented essential oils on the thighs near the pussy or just above it on the lower belly. While the body heats up from the excitement, the essentials become more fragrant. However, most people who really enjoy cunnilingus agree that the musky smell of woman's sexual odor is as much of the turn-on as the powerful orgasms that are produced.

2.)What About Cunnilingus During Menstruation?

Cunnilingus during menstruation is definitely a personal decision between you and your partner. If this is a concern for you in any way, do not do it! Those who do like to take this adventure, usually use a tampon during strong flow times. Actually, there is no particular danger in menstrual blood, as long as your partner has no infections is HIV/AIDS negative. As a matter of fact, orgasms during menstruation can help alleviate period cramps.

3.)Are There Any Tricks to a Quickie Orgasm ?

There is no such thing as the ultimate "quickie orgasm secret" that applies to any one woman or all women, for that matter. Being good at cunnilingus involves knowing basic female anatomy and being a good listener: listen to her and then listen to her body. ASK HER what she likes in cunnilingus!

What is Analingus and how is it done?

Analingus is licking with your tongue over your partner's anal opening. Absolute hygiene is required for this sexual delicacy! Make certain that your partner has just showered and is very clean. At no time should your tongue come into contact with the anal surface itself. Hepatitis is not fun, so make sure your fun is protected by using a dam or even plastic wrap, if you're in a pinch!

Your partner should lie on his/her back with his/her legs in the air and his knees close to his/her shoulders as this spreads his/her buttocks apart, allowing you greater access to his anus. The nerve endings around the anus respond to licking around the area. Analingus, combined with other activities such as vigorous penis or clitoral stimulation with the hand or vibrating toys heightens the arousal and sensitivities of the anus.

Fellatio Oral Sex Pic (Image Credit: Another Sex Tutorial)

What is Fellatio and how is it done?

Oral sex for men is called fellatio. Other than lots of practice and finding out what feels good for both the receiver and the giver, there is no need for a seminar on this favorite of sexual practices! Obviously, the lips and the tongue are the major sources of stimulation. Most men find having their penis sucked, licked and kissed intensely exciting, producing incredible orgasms. Therefore, specific skills, techniques, and positions are not as important as the comfort levels of the participants to "go for it" in whatever way satisfies them. Many men like as much stimulation as possible and like the feel of a wet mouth and hands on the penis, as well.

Occasionally, men are worried they may be bitten or scratched by the teeth. If the partner opens his/her mouth as wide as possible, closes his/her lips but not his/her teeth over the penis, there should be no problem with this. Using all the muscles in the lips and tongue will mean that the teeth should not come into contact with the penis at all. The best way is to become familiar with the activity in an easy, relaxed way and add on from there. Remember, the main thing is to have a good time.

Some find that they start to gag or choke during fellatio. Moving the head and mouth in different positions will help remedy this situation. If the "gag reflex" continues to be an issue, try putting only the head of the penis into the mouth to get used to the sensation, then slowly allow more and more over time to adjust to the fullness feeling in the mouth. Usually over time and with much patience and practice, the "gag reflex" can be resolved to the point of nonexistence.

Like everything, every penis is unique and different with individually preferred sensitive areas. People like to be touched and fondled in different ways. Ask your partner how they would like you to touch them. Go by your partner's reactions, sounds etc. and you will know if it is going okay.

What are some Techniques?

The male genitals are highly sensitive to pain so be very gentle. Try starting with kissing your partner's face and mouth gradually proceeding to his genitals and then stimulate the penis with your lips and tongue lick all along the shaft, exploring all its shape, thickness, soft skin.

Explore from the textured crown on top with its meatus or opening, then to the frenum or frenulum, the sensitive place where the glans joins the shaft on the underside, the string-like portion coming down from the head to the ring of skin, called the corona. Some men are uncircumcised and therefore have foreskin around the head of their penis (corona and frenum). And don't forget "the boys", the scrotum (testicles) loves attention with your lips and tongue tip, also!

You can provide the highest degree of sensation to yourself and your partner by kneeling between his legs and approaching his penis from the bottom rather than from the side or the top. One of the simplest and nicest actions is to move your mouth up and down on his penis. This is called sliding. Take the head of the penis in your mouth and suck it, tickling it at the same time with your tongue, then move your lips up and down the shaft, sucking and pressing with your lips and tongue, followed by sliding slow or fast taking in as much penis into your mouth as you like, then drawing the penis out slowly while still sucking on it.

Another method is to treat it like a lollipop: lick upwards from the testicles to the top of the penis, and to heighten his orgasm, place your thumb at the very base of the penis blocking the tube through which the semen spurts so the the semen cannot escape, then at the same time suck vigorously on the head of his penis, so that your partner's ejaculation of semen will last much longer and be very intense

And to add some anal play with it begin a slow playful search around his buttocks, as your partner relaxes and allows you access, gently insert your latex gloved finger into his anus, you will be at the area of the prostate gland when your finger is inside completely, so massage this gland with your finger to produce delightful sensations for your partner or use a prostate stimulating vibrator instead!

What about the Smell or Taste?

Nicely ask him to go take a shower if the smell is unpleasant to you. Basic hygiene is essential in any sexual practice and necessary in this age of prevalent STDs (Sexually Transmitted Diseases). There is no problem if your partner is healthy with no infection, besides, the mouth does have millions more germs than a clean penis.

Many women enjoy having their partner ejaculate into their mouth, however, some women find the idea of swallowing semen repugnant. It is up to the individual how you handle this issue. Many men feel that by swallowing their semen, you accept a part of themselves into your body to totally complete your lovemaking but many people don't like the taste of semen. You have to work it out with each other. And believe it or not you can help change some of the taste and smell of semen by the foods you eat. For example, alkaline-based foods such as meats and fish produce a bitter, fishy taste and dairy products contain a high bacterial putrefaction level which creates a foul taste, but acidic fruits and alcohol give a pleasant, sugary taste, But remember, chemically processed liquors will cause an extremely acidic taste, so drink high-quality, naturally fermented beers or sake!

And if you are counting calories, no worries... the caloric content of an average semen ejaculation is estimated to be approximately 15 calories. For the scientific researchers, here's the chemical contents: aboutonia, ascorbic acid, blood-group antigens, calcium, chlorine, cholesterol, choline, , citric acid, creatine, eoxyribonucleic acid (DNA), fructose, glutathione, hyaluronidase, inositol, lactic acid, magnesium, nitrogen, phosphorus, potassium, purine, pyrimidine, pyruvic acid, sodium, sorbitol, spermidine, spermine, urea, uric acid, vitamin B12, zinc. Wow! That's better than a One-A-Day vitamin!!

What is the 69 position?

The '69' position is so called because as a couple engage in oral sex with eachother at the same time, they form a 6-9 (top of head of six is on the genitals of 9 and vice versa!). This is an excellent way of arousing each other and some people feel that it is the best position in which to perform oral sex.

Each partner lies with their head by each other's genitals (most penises curve upwards towards the head, and that curve matches the curve of the throat in the 69 position). Most couples really enjoy this position for extreme intimacy with eachother as a way of "you get yours and I get mine" at the same time! However, don't worry if one becomes a little more distracted and "forgets" what he or she is doing... just relax and enjoy the licking and sucking and nibbling... even if both get to orgasm at the same time or at all, it's always a great way to segue into more lovemaking!


There is the risk of being infected with HIV or other STD's (Sexually Transmitted Diseases) in having unprotected oral sex with a man or a woman, however, it is not as risky as unprotected anal or vaginal sex. HIV is found in: blood, breast milk, semen, and vaginal fluids. The virus can transmitted through: cuts, mucous membranes (anus, mouth, vagina), openings and sores on your body.

During oral sex, to avoid risk of HIV infection, if you are unsure of your partner's health history it is important to keep semen and vaginal fluids out of your mouth, so use a condom or dam! And make sure that your mouth is healthy and you do not have bleeding gums, cuts, or mouth sores, as the presence of blood will increase your risk.

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